Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Why Do We Do It


Growing up, I couldn't stand it when I questioned parental motives only to be told "because I said so!" The unjustness of it all! So when I became a parent, I vowed to always help my Critters understand the whys and what-fors behind my logic, assuming that as young, but rational human beings they would value being treated as such.

I was wrong.

They just don't get it. No matter how much effort is expended attempting to enlighten them, they generally refuse to acknowledge the wisdom of age and experience. Maybe it's because their brains aren't done being wired yet. A smarter mom would take St. Francis' admonition to "seek not so much to be understood as to understand" at face value, but determined Momster that I am, I've gotta give it one more shot. So speaking for Husband as well (whether he wants me to or not) here goes....


NAG - Because you don't do it right away/ the first time we tell you/ thoroughly/ without being told.

GUILT - We want you to think about your actions and how they affect the world beyond your nose.

COMPLAIN - Admit it: You are messy, loud, lazy, inconsiderate & immature. Our job is to fix you.

SAY NO - It's a knee-jerk reaction, easier to take back than a YES should we change our minds.

ASSIGN CHORES - To teach responsibility, team work, work ethic, cause and effect, etc....

TAKE OVER - Cuz you're doing it wrong, whining or being a pain, and we're too tired to deal.

In general, EVERYTHING we do as parents is because we love you and want what is best for you. Sometimes that means being the bad guy, the fall guy, the guy behind the wheel eight hours out of twenty-four, or telling you yet again to eat healthy food, not junk, though we know you won't listen. It means putting up with you when we'd rather put you out, and saying no even though you hate us for it because it's what you need, not what you want. And despite the fact that you don't get it, one day you will.

But by then it will be too late.

You'll be parents.

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